dear god, i found you so

dear God,

i don't think i can quite recapture the beauty i've witnessed and the faith i've been able to feel during the retreat. however God, i can tell you that whatever's changed in me, it's a good change. i feel like i've become more beautiful - on the inside. yesterday night, during the love feast, i cried not of sadness, but of joy; joy of finding You at last, joy of seeing just how much You have the ability to change everyone's lives. so dear God, please thank those like pastor david, the praise band, and pastor esther for being such an important connection to You. just being in an environment with people who wish to continue their walk with you for three days has completely altered my life. i can honestly and truthfully say that the retreat was the most amazing experience i've had in my entire fifteen years of living. i know not what You bring me from now on, but i'm not scared at all. because i know You have a plan for me, because i know You'll guide me to all the right directions, give me all the strength i need, and provide me with all the love in the world. Your mercy that was shown through each individual's actions over the last couple days has shown me just what and how it feels like to be a true Christian, and God, i don't think i could've ever been able to go through all of this if it wasn't for You. the way people connected, renewed their love for each other, sought Your help.. all of it. i cried after the realization of how much Your presence exists in these people, and i cry now, because it still awes me strikingly. i now know that what i've thought of You before this experience is incomparable to how i think of You now. for the first time, i shed tears for those i didn't know. for the first time, i prayed for those i barely knew. for the first time, i was entirely selfless. for the first time, i prayed with my heart. for the first time, i sang for You at the top of my lungs until my voice gave away. it was more than just love i could see hear and touch; i could sense You there, with me, with everyone in that room. even still, i can't fully describe those moments. dear God, thank You. thank You. and thank You again, for loving the undeserving and forgiving me for the times i've disappointed You. thank You, God, for making me realize what mercy is and how happiness really feels. Thank You.

I once was lost, but now I'm found

I once was lost, but now I'm found
So far away, but I'm home now
I once was lost, but now I'm found
And now my lifesong sings

I once was blind, but now I see
I once was blind, but now I see
I don't know how, but when He touched me
I once was blind, but now I see

And now my lifesong sings
And now my lifesong sings
And now my lifesong sings

I once was dead, but now I live
I once was dead, but now I live
Now my life to You I give
Now my life to You I give
Now my life to You I give

Hallelujah
Hallelujah
Let my lifesong sing to You