recapitulations

I never had a reason to doubt, you see.

John died.

Jack did too,

and Jane, and Spot, and the lovely family of four 

fenced in by dirty (you didn't see that coming, did you?)

stained

grimy 

white fences,

the kind that makes you think of

creme, or blanc,

but really, it's just

whitewashed wood in the midst of pretension.

I dug up no lies, no actors in masquerade,

but the book ended

all too abruptly, like

!

Like some crude, hand drawn warning sign

ignored by the traffic,

laughed at by the road kill,

and its only purpose,

to forewarn the bloody mess.

And I found no irrational thoughts

underneath it all,

but I stopped thinking, you know.

I hoped you'd be able to tell,

when you died too.

grapefruit

And so, the sour adventure begins.

To be was never a question,

but to exist, of course, it might have been;

an extrapolation, was never a necessity,

but the fall.

The fall, oh, it was awful.

Its remnants of sugarless dreams,

the one that speckled the rind with brown sugar –

what it could, what one knew…

that mattered not, did it?

It was of nuisance to the bud,

but fun, in a sadistic way,

that I could never forget.

It felled a silence,

and out with the oranges,

the lemons, and everything citruses,

even the kitchen soap,

they sighed;

longing, for the same effect,

of a bitter, and never honeyed,

play on the senses.

Little did they know,

it was a grapefruit,

only a grapefruit,

and forever a grapefruit;

its acidic tart,

a sorry reminder

of what tried to be a

sweet,

darling,

thing.

s'il vous plaît

i want, more than anything, to be an exception.

to find an exception,

to love an exception,

and to accept the exception.

i'm convinced otherwise,

but that doesn't mean i've lost hope.

selfish selflessness

"Last year, I was going to kill myself. I wrote a note and slipped it into my best friend's locker at school. That night, I was preparing to die, when she crawled through my window and kissed me. My first real kiss. 

Kristain, I know you read GivesMeHope all the time. Will you marry me?"

givesmehope.com

Thank God, for this beautiful story.

second day, and i'm already exhausted

not much else to say.

two hours late

2010,

I welcome you.

Please be good to me, and I'll be good to you.














ATM: Dancing in the Moonlight, Toploader.